Get a Real Job!

Many young actors back in the NYC of the 1990s spent months at a time on tour, doing classical theatre, or TYA musicals, or message plays focused on social issues. It was a way to add credits to your resume, pay the rent for a few months, and maybe even save up a little money to get through a dry spell until you booked the next show. 

Remembering Mimi

There was a funny commercial I remember from childhood. It was for C&C Cola. A red headed lady was talking about a taste test with Coke and Pepsi, but every time she tried to say, “Coke and Pepsi,” a car horn would beep. Until the end, when she rushed it in before the horn.

I met this lady in 1993, when we both were cast in a season of summer stock in Kentucky.

Banning Peter Pan

“Have you seen my childhood?”

Sings the creepy wax figure as, above him, little children sail to the moon in flying boats. His legion of fans still claim he was a magical being, too sensitive and innocent for this world. Me? I’m wondering which of those flying children he molested.

Standing in the Wings

“Do you ever get stage fright?”

One of the most common questions an actor is asked. Entirely understandable, since many people have a fear of speaking in public. Anyone who is not an actor might imagine that it must be terrifying to step on a stage in front of an audience.

My answer? Never. Not ever. To me, the stage is the safest place in the world.

Shadows in the Park

Peter Quince stood in front of the crowd and began to introduce the play:

“The Most Lamentable Comedy and Most Cruel Death of Pyramus and Thisbe.”

I’ve been in several productions of A Midsummer Night’s Dream. I’ve played both Pyramus and Thisbe, the title characters in the play within the play. I’ve also played Oberon, Theseus, and Demetrius. So I’ve watched the rude mechanicals put on this performance from the house, as well.

How Far Would You Drive To Audition?

It used to be, years ago, that you showed up to the Actors’ Equity building for an audition at four in the morning and waited on line. Outside. On the sidewalk. People brought blankets and folding chairs and cups of hot chocolate and books to read. This was before. Before cell phones, and before things changed.

The Good News

“Do you have a relationship with Jesus?”

Oh, man. Why did she have to go and do that? We were having a perfectly wonderful day together. I’d worked with this older lady a few times before. Doing background on a tv show, or a commercial. Maybe a movie. You tend to cross paths with the same people eventually, when you do this sort of work long enough. You make friends, since sometimes you are spending a fifteen hour day sitting together in the holding area.

A Thousand Words

“You look like a mime.”

That came from the photographer who was shooting my headshot. Years ago. Back in New York. When we were still shooting in black and white. Film. Not digital.

People say that to me all the time, and I don’t mean when I am wearing white face. Photographers, casting directors, every day people I come across. They don’t know that I am, in fact, a mime. They just tell me that I look like one.

Set Pieces At Home

Sometimes I joke that half of what I own was used in a show. It’s not far from the truth, actually. So many of the items around my house were originally purchased as a prop or set piece for a play, or they were already my belongings and I cast them in a show. Or two. Or three. That’s one of the things that happens when you do small budget theatre.

Don’t Mess With The Easter Bunny

There was a story in the news last year about an Easter Bunny getting into a brawl with some guy in a New Jersey mall. Naturally, there was footage, and it was pretty funny. The kind of funny when you know you should not be laughing, because… do I need to say it? There are kids standing around horrified.